How do YOU get your own way? – Look at need-fulfilment strategies
We learn behaviour strategies at a very early age. We soon discover that if we act in a particular way we get what we want, and if we act in another way, we don’t. This depends on the significant adults in our lives when we are young. The reaction of these people tends to be quite consistent towards us, even if this means that they are consistently inconsistent. This sets up a pattern of response in us, which remains fixed unless we experience overwhelming responses that make us change, or we become aware of our patterns.
Although there is literally an infinite number of ways in which we act to fulfil our needs, we can distil these down to three broad categories, namely submissive behaviour, aggressive behaviour and assertive behaviour. It is important to remember that these exist along a continuum, and that we sometimes use different types of response with different people or situations. Although our behaviour may lean more or less strongly towards one of these broad categories, we will present examples of only the ‘typical’ or ‘average’ response. Again, most of these behaviours are simply behaviours that we have ‘learned’ at one stage or other of our lives, and by becoming aware of them we gain the power to change them.
There are many things that will help you in Sue’s book “Peace of Mind – Pathways to Successful Living”. Download chapter 1 free now!
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