Thoughts about validation: think of this today and every day!
Think of the things you appreciate in yourself at work, or at home, or qualities that you have that you feel good about. It can be something quite simple. Write a list about how you are / what you do that you appreciate and like about yourself.
If you want, do this exercise with someone else and appreciate each other, giving your “partner” a verbal pat on the back, indeed, appreciate the person you have been listening to for their caring and competence. If necessary, help the other person to come up with things they feel good about, and if they get stuck in negative things, encourage them to move on.
Strange as this may seem, it is asking rather a lot to expect another person to love us if we don’t consider ourselves good enough for our own love. Or perhaps we find it difficult to love ourselves because that would be conceit. If we look back to where our resistance to this idea originates, we will come to understand a great deal about the way we approach life. Louise Hay (1991) identifies some of the ways in which we sabotage ourselves by acting or thinking negatively.
It is an almost universal tendency to criticise and berate ourselves for not being as good as we feel we should be at a particular thing or activity. In fact ‘should’ is one of the most common words we apply to ourselves. We ‘should’ be better parents, better employees, and better people in general. If we were asked to think of a list of things we were bad at, the chances are we would think of a lot pretty quickly!
MAKE SURE THAT YOU STICK WITH THE POSITIVE.
From “Peace of Mind – Pathways to Successful Living” by Sue Washington